Category: Recovery

      From The Dark Into The Light

I am glad I was around.

You were going to the dark side of town.

You said you had to help someone.

I knew where you were coming from.

You would always think of others.

You would help them, despite your druthers.

It is not safe on the dark side of town.

There are rapists and evil clowns.

You will feel better if I come along.

Only for protection, don’t get me wrong.

You will want me to be around.

When you go to the dark side of town.

Together, we will make a team.

A couple who are looking mean.

Ready to take on any threat.

Don’t try something you will regret.

We made it to the one you seek.

They were ready to claim defeat.

They had hit bottom. Down and out.

Lying in an alley with feces about.

The place stunk to high heaven.

He had reached his Armageddon.

He was drunk and smelled like a brewery.

Too undernourished for any Tom Foolery.

He barely had the energy to walk with help.

This place wouldn’t rate one star on Yelp.

You will want me to be around.

When you go to the dark side of town.

Together, we will make a team.

A couple who are looking mean.

Ready to take on any threat.

Don’t try anything you will regret.

We got him up and the hell out of there.

He was almost more than we could bare.

She said “Are you ready to go with me?”

He said “Anywhere is a better place to be.”

We hailed a cab and took him home.

Cleaned him up and said he wasn’t alone.

Nursed him back to health again.

Got him in A.A. where he made a friend.

He remained sober and worked the steps.

He got a job. He had no regrets.

—————————-R. W. Johnson—–(2016)

Addict Makes A Recovery

Once I was a druggie, down and out.
I loved to get high, without a doubt.
Be it pills, booze, crack, or grass.
I would go at it till I fell on my ass.

Then one day, when I was really low,
I sat wondering; ‘where does this go?’
If I kept on like this I would be gone.
I had a feeling it wouldn’t take long.

I decided to change my ways.
I looked old, flabby, & pretty frayed.
I got online & read a lot.
Much of it was just a crock.

You are what you eat.
Eat veggies, fruit, nuts, & meat.
Do everything in moderation.
Even exercise, to my elation.

Keep away from everything I did before.
Now that really opened up a new door.
Do prayer & meditation.
Before bed or when you awaken.

Drink pure water. Much more than usual.
Yet, don’t overdo it. It’s a good move though.
I had my list of what to do.
I would need some help from you.

It was real rough starting out.
Till I learned what it was about.
Till I flushed & detoxed my system,
I didn’t know what I was missing.

I ate organic fruits & veggies.
No more processed food. Not even spaghetti.
After a couple months I had it down.
People were amazed when they came around.

I lost weight & looked super healthy.
My body looked like I was wealthy.
My muscles had definition.
I looked like I was on a mission.

A six pack was starting to show.
I had tons of energy, you know.
Girls were beginning to look my way.
It was a ton of work, but worth every day.

Addicts, let this be a lesson for you.
You can become just like this to.
Just set your mind & save your life.
You will have much less strain & strife.

——————————-R. W. Johnson—–(2015)

      The Edict Of Depression

Saturday and Sunday has blurred into one.

I spent time in a bar, walking the streets,

or in my small, one room flat, drinking rum.

I hardly remember what I had to eat.

I cannot recall the point where I became

the person who lives here in this existence.

Not sending Christmas or birthday cards is lame.

I become exhausted instead of tired, without resistance.

Things rarely start & stop at identifiable points.

Life tends to shade from one state to another.

To evolve, then dissolve, to grow like moving joints,

then fade & fall away—- like all others.

Books and poems with their words hide this.

With their quantized approach to reality.

With their pretence that emotional starts & stops exist.

That you can be in one state, then another, callously

refers to a life that is in one continual flux.

Yet, it all blends together, like a mental storm.

Nothing stays with me, except my tortured gut.

This is a perpetual hell into which I was born.

Alcohol just rounds off the sharp edges.

Things roll along easier when one is blotto.

I never give money or make any pledges.

Just to half-heartedly ‘ maintain,’ is my motto.

Nothing to look forward to. The past is a blur.

I live in an existence that is like a fog.

Don’t ask me where I’m going, I’m not sure.

I pass out each night and sleep like a log.

In the morning, nothing has changed.

No one is concerned.— No one cares.

I guess there is no one else to blame.

Loneliness is a state that is impossible to share.

———————————————R. W. Johnson—–(2015)